Help... I need somebody...

I do not know if anyone even reads this anymore but I am taking this moment to vent...

I am so overwhelmed right now I can't stand it, and I feel like I have no where to turn. I am used to being the one to help everyone in their time of need, or even when they don't need it. I am okay with it, and I usually try not to put my problems on someone else but I need advice from someone and I can not seem to get it. There are so many other things going on that I have just put off dealing with my own things for so long. I am so over my head in bills and money issues that I have actually had to contemplate quitting school for a while to work 2 full time jobs just to get caught up. I already work two jobs, which I thought was working hard enough but apparently it is not good enough. I work a combined 60 hours between my two jobs a week plus spend 6 hours in classes and about another 15 hours a week on homework... that doesn't leave much time to do anything. I am so sick of the constant run around, I just want to lock my door, shut off my phone and lay in the dark for 24 hours without a single interruption. I am tired all the time and yet I still manage to push through everyday and usually get quite a few things accomplished. Yet why do I still feel like such a failure and such a loser. I give advice to people when they come to me and yet I can not even control my own life. Where do I go? Where do I turn? How do I get out of this hole I seem to have dug myself into?

As the Beatles said : "Help me if you can, I'm feeling down And I do appreciate you being round.Help me, get my feet back on the ground,Won't you please, please help me".... I down the end of ropes, I need to figure out how to get my head back above the water. I have put off helping myself for so long (which I told myself after J and I broke up that I would put only myself first and I didn't... obviously) I have to start concentrating on how to help myself and get out of this hole.


I am happy though to report that my sister told me yesterdat that she is expecting a LITTLE GIRL! I am going to have a niece/goddaughter! I can not wait to meet her! March will not come soon enough!!